Ashli Lomeli ~ Poetry

Ashli is a graduate student in the MA in English at Azusa Pacific University. She began writing at a young age as method of coping with isolation and abuse. Now she aspires to use writing to produce works that represent the underrepresented, focusing on topics like mental illness, sexuality, and identity.

Knuckles

I fight it most when I wake,
When I’m faced with decision
To live

Shhh

While my eyes are still closed
It begs me to ignore
Whistling birdsong
Whispering wind

I open my eyes

When I sit up in my bed
It grabs me by the back of my shirt

Don’t

Pulls my collar against my neck,
Chokes me so I can’t fight back

I stand

When I stare at hanging clothes
Faced with decision—again—

It bids me return,
Its voice like feathers
Against my cheek,
To sleep

Come back

I dress

When I enter my car,
Drive onto the street,
It caresses my ear
Tells me to turn just a little,
Meet that car nose to nose,

Sweet nothings, darling

I drive carefully

But still,
It whisps out of my car with me,
Hugs my ankles like a cold mist
Of iron chain
Dragging on the asphalt,
A screeching only I can hear

Give up

I fight until my knuckles

Bleed